A metaphysician, in the philosophical sense, studies the fundamental nature of reality and existence. This study extends beyond Newtonian physics and the physical realm. Much of the work is based on quantum physics and what many would consider spiritual.

A practicing metaphysician then is a healer who makes changes in the physical world through metaphysical principles including the principles of thoughts, emotions, energy, and spirit. Seems like magic…but it isn’t. Simply, I can help you transmute unhealthy thoughts, emotions, patterns of behavior, and belief systems, into positive energy so you may lead the life you were intended and deserve.

Metaphysicians get to the core issue of why something is occurring. To do this, one must be in touch with all the different energies that are coming together to create an experience. Metaphysicians are specifically trained to be highly observant of these energies and interpret them based on our understanding of human nature.

Once the core of the issue is identified, the metaphysician then determines how to right the situation if that is what is appropriate. Typically, there is a faulty thought driving the emotions or reactivity of a person which then interferes with the person’s quality of life. That faulty thought must be removed, or it will continue to skew the perspective of the person and prevent any progress in life. I am a kind of thought surgeon. How I go about removing thoughts from someone’s head is varied depending on the age and state of the person. Most of the time I look first for the origin of the thought which is often in childhood. As an adult, the client can generate a more accurate understanding of what really occurred during the moment the thought was implanted which opens the door to genuine healing.

I would like to share with you how I have applied metaphysical principles to help families that are struggling.

A child that is not thriving in some manner requires a gentle and sometimes indirect approach. The indirect approach refers to removing a faulty thought from the parent not the child. Kind of shocking to consider that the behavior or “problems” we see in the child is often manifested by the parent’s thoughts. I didn’t want to believe it myself when I was doing (and continue to do) this work around my own children. I have lots of kids with lots of issues (AD/HD, depression, anxiety, genetic syndromes, giftedness, twice-exceptionality, brain damage, neurological disorders, epilepsy, etc.). I have been at it for 21 years with my own kids. The only massive shifts for the better in the children’s attitudes, health, productivity, behavior, and school work, has resulted from me letting go of old beliefs of how things should be.

Let me give you an example of how this may play out. A boy may act out of control. He may be getting in trouble in school or not performing to his potential. Western society will look to the child’s condition or diagnosis to explain what is happening. This can be valuable and helpful, however, there is always a deeper lesson to be learned than maybe just to medicate or change a child who is acting out. I believe deep down we all sense this but are at a loss as to what to do. I know I was.

Often the parent is having difficulties setting boundaries with people due to faulty thoughts they took on during their own childhood, and, therefore, the child feels out of control and then manifests problematic behavior.

An example might be a parent cannot consistently say no to a request for sugary treats upon the child’s request even when the parent desires to do so. The child is like a crazed gambler hoping for his next sugar score and badgers the parent on a daily basis for treats. The parent sometimes says yes and sometimes no with no real clarity as to why in either the yes or the no moment. This sends a very confusing message to the child who then starts to believe that their demands really do have power. The power the child experiences then drives their persistent requests. This is also complicated by the fact that sugar is highly addictive. The child ends up feeling like they are in charge given they can control an outcome via their behavior.

A child is terrified of being in control, because they are children and are not ready developmentally to be in control of anything. Subconsciously, the child starts to send out a cry for help in the form of behavior which is the child’s most effective form of communication due to the fact that they are unable to articulate the needs of their subconscious mind (or hardly even their conscious mind). The child’s behavior may be difficult to interpret by the parent, so the parent starts to punish or provide consequences for the behavior. This doesn’t work, and the child continues to act out because the need for a sense of security and control is still not present.

So, why does the parent have difficulty with setting the boundary around sugary sweets when they know sugar is not good for the child and being inconsistent with a child is also unhealthy for a child’s sense of security and attachment? This is where the metaphysician would begin to work with the parent to identify the core fear the parent really has when confronted with saying no in this situation. It could be that the parent fears the loss of love from the child if they say no to them. It could be the parent was often denied love by their own parents or that food was a substitute for affection. Whatever the fear, as soon as the parent can identify it and remove it and heal their own emotions, they will have less difficulty setting healthy, loving boundaries with their child. The child will soon learn that the parent is not going to budge and they will move on from the constant badgering for sweets. The lack of sugar in their diet will also greatly improve their physical, emotional, and mental health. Bonus!

Basically, if parents are not in control of their lives and live in fear, the children will not feel secure in their lives. If mom and dad are scared (no matter how well they think they are hiding it), it makes sense the child will be afraid as well. Very often I find that when parents begin to learn through me how to set boundaries after letting go of their faulty thoughts, the child’s behavior then calms down. Pretty soon the parent forgets why they originally came to see me.

The child’s behavior will remain as a lesson for the adult until the parent heals their fear and releases their faulty thought. You can try to manage the child’s behavior or medicate it, and, this approach does not always eliminate the behavior. If you don’t believe me, try it. You have nothing to lose by learning to set boundaries in your own life. When you see the shift in the child after you do your own work, you will be thrilled because nothing was actually done to or with the child!

The key here is to realize that if I were to work with the child and help them stop behaving in a certain manner, the parent would miss their life lesson on how to set boundaries. Typically, the child will up their game (or more accurately, their lesson plan), and the parent will end up with a more challenging lesson later in life that they might not really enjoy very much. I have had this experience myself.

On occasion, the child is more spiritually evolved than the parent which I am seeing more and more every year. This means the child is the teacher and the parent is the student. Kind of makes you cringe a little doesn’t it? These children are either mirroring something for us to learn, or they are presenting a new lesson for us to begin to master. And, yes, many of my children are more spiritually evolved than me. Groan. I am getting schooled (literally) every day!

Here is the silver lining – the seemingly bad things that are happening in our lives and the problems our kids are having are all opportunities for us to heal and grow. This life is not a punishment. It is a sort of school for us to learn. Once we take that in, we can start to become more grateful for what is present.